ClueChick: real clues from a real chick

Who are you?

I am an honest to goodness CL CE girl. I have posted casual encounter ads, and I have responded to CE ads. I’ve even met up with guys I picked up (or who picked me up), and in some cases, I’ve even fucked them. Yes, it’s true, there are actual women who actually want to fuck the men they meet on the internet, and I am one of them.

Why are you writing this blog?

Short form: I want more good responses to my ads.

Long form: I’m pro-sex. I think people who want to have sex should be able to have sex, and I’m in favor of two or more people who want sex to be able to get together and make it happen. The more sex people who want sex get, the happier they are, and the better a place the world is.

Also, it would be nice to improve the level of quality of responses to my (and other women’s) CL posts, and I know it’s pretty demoralizing for the guys out there, too.

Who is your target audience?

I hate the idea that some truly awful guy would come here and figure out how to sneak under the "wackjob" radar based on the advice/commentary I give. I'm reassured by the fact that the few times I've received an email from this type, their response has typically been, "You're so wrong, you don't know what you're talking about." Phew!

My target audience is twofold: First, obviously, good guys who are discouraged or challenged or what-have-you by the online dating scene. I know lots of these, and I hope to bring both humor and good advice into their lives. Second, of course, would be women who are in the online scene, and who will recognize and relate to my experiences, perhaps share their own and their insights, and, I hope, get a good laugh along with me at the absurdity of some of the guys out there.

Can I email you with a question?

Of course! You can email me at ClueChick@gmail.com

Why should I listen to your advice?

If you have to ask that question, you probably shouldn’t.

I want to email you, but I'm concerned about my privacy.

I will never post anything personal or private you send me without your explicit permission. That is, if you send me a photograph, a draft of an email or an ad, poetry, or a scan of last night's dinner receipt, I will not post it here or on any other web site. I will never share your email address in any forum unless you give me the OK.

That said, I may use questions people ask or topics that come up in private correspondence as a jumping-off point for a post here. I will not name names when I do so, and you may choose to identify yourself in comments, or not -- either way is fine.

If you send me a link to a really cool web site or other resource that I think will be useful or entertaining to my readers, I will almost certainly want to share it. In these cases, as long as the resource is publicly available, and any reasonable person could find it through a google search, I will probably go ahead and post it. This does not, obviously, include links to personal web pages and the like.

What you see me posting here does include real ads posted by men on various dating sites. As these are publicly posted, I think of them as fair game. Even so, I'll never post someone's email address (even one of the temporary CL addresses) without the individual's permission. I also sometimes post responses I've gotten to my ads or profiles on various sites. In these cases, I always strip identifying information, and I always will.

A lot of what you say sounds really general, not just about CL ads. Is your advice just about CL and other dating sites?

No. In fact, my advice probably does apply across the board: CL w4m, when you’re posting your own on CE or m4w, or on other dating sites. I might even go so far as to say that my advice applies in all aspects of relationships, but you’ll have to test it out for yourself and see. The thing is, when you're successful at meeting people in one context, it tends to spill over into other realms, too.

Will you send me your photo/go out with me/fuck me?

Probably not, but you're welcome to try to convince me that you're worth it.

Okay, then, what do you look like?

I'm reasonably cute, with curly brown hair and blue eyes. I look wholesome, but don't let that fool you; I'm really very naughty.

You use a lot of abbreviations. What do they mean?

CL = Craig's List, my favorite personal ad board, as well as a generally nifty community resource. There's a specific CL board for most major metro areas in the US.
CE = Casual Encounters. This is a section of Craig's List where people can post for, well, casual encounters.
m4w = man for woman, another personals category on Craig's List, as well as shorthand for any ad by a man looking for a woman
w4m = woman for man, the flip side of m4w.
NSA = No strings attached, aka, a casual encounter. This can mean anything from a one night stand (ONS) to an ongoing thing with no expectations for emotional involvement.
FWB = Friends with benefits, aka fuckbuddies

What about other abbreviations that show up online? Can you help with those?

Some of them! I'm still confused by some, so if people have things to add here, drop me a line.

These first ones are mostly from Dan Savage's column, which I adore:
GGG = good, giving and game
DTMFA = dump the motherfucker already
HTH = how'd that happen?

VGL = very good looking
CD = cross dresser
w4w, m4m = duh
m4t, etc = man for tranny, etc
BBW = big beautiful woman or beautiful black woman