Saying what you mean in your ad or profile: fit
Ahh, the ongoing bugaboo on appearance. Let's just take it as a given that when looking for a date, a mate or a hookup, we all want to find someone who's attractive to us. Let's also take it as given that each person has different "types" who they find attractive, and I'm not really in the business of scolding people for their tastes. Great.
Lots of men say, of the woman they're looking for, that she should be "fit". I always assume this is social code for "thin" or, at least, "not fat". This is silly. Fit is orthogonal to fat. That is, they're not on the same line, and that means that you can have both or neither or one or the other. Fit is not, after all, a body type but a condition. If what you mean is that you want someone who can keep up with you when you hike Mt. Hood or ski the Alps, then, yes, you want someone fit (and you may want to specify just how fit you mean). If, on the other hand, you want someone slim, just come out and say it.
Comments
Oh God, yes, that drives me NUTS.
There's worse, and that is people who use attractive as a synonym for thin. That's not only confusing, but offensive. (I once got in a tiff with an acquaintance who was ranting to me about the people she was meeting through her personal ad. "Look, I want someone attractive. If you aren't, fine, but don't say you are if you aren't. Some of these people describe themselves as 'attractive' but turn out to be quite large. I hate dishonesty!"
Ummm...
And can I rant for a minute about the "body type" options many dating sites give you? Let's see, there's "average" (do they mean actual national average, which is 20 lb "overweight" by charts? Or do they mean "average" in the colloquial sense of neither under nor overweight?), "a few extra pounds" ("few" meaning, what, 10? 50? 100?), "large" or "abundant" (which is larger???) Yeesh.
Posted by: sapiophile | December 27, 2005 4:15 PM
What mystifies me is the difference between "average" and "weight to height proportional". Many dating sites list them as body type choices, but what does the latter category mean? Apparently it's not a synonym for average, because the choices are mutually exclusive.
Posted by: watusi | December 28, 2005 4:32 PM