ClueChick: real clues from a real chick

Once upon a time, it was somewhat uncommon for people to have pictures of themselves in digital formats. Even if you had email and chat systems, you might not have easy access to a scanner or a digital camera, and you actually had to go out of your way to get a picture of yourself up online.

These days, you may have to go out of your way, but most people have lots of digitized pictures of themselves, and so the expectation is that you do, too. I can't imagine trying to navigate the waters of online dating if I didn't have a photograph to send somewhere between first contact and first face-to-face meeting. If you don't have one, I can't recommend highly enough that you get one.

It is not enough, however, simply to have a photograph. It really ought to be a good one. People will typically assume that the photo you send when you're trying to hit it off with someone is a photo that shows you in what you think is a good light. If the photo sucks, they will be assuming that this is a good picture of you -- you looking your best, or nearly so -- so if it's a terrible picture ... well, you get the idea.

The picture should look like you, and the current you. If you've changed a lot in the last six months, you should have a picture from more recently than six months ago. If you haven't changed in two years, a two-year-old photograph is just fine. When in doubt, ask a friend.

It should be a reasonably good photograph. It doesn't have to be 800 ultra-super-megapixels, but it shouldn't be blurry, fuzzy or otherwise difficult to make out what you look like. It should also be bigger than a thumbnail. I don't want to have to use a magnifying glass to try to figure out what you look like.

On the question of headshots vs. full-body shots, some people feel very strongly that you should include a full-body picture. I actually don't care so much about that, and between a picture where I can see a body well or one where I can see the face clearly, I'll take the face.

And, finally, if you're going to be demanding about the photographs your potential date sends you, you'd damn well be ready to pony up your own portfolio, possibly even before getting pushy to see more from her.