Why it pays to be selective in your personal ad desires
At least a couple of times a week, I see a man's CE ad that says something along the lines of, "I don't care what you look like." This is sheer stupidity talking. Here's why:
First, you're lying. Everyone cares about looks, to some degree or other. You may have different tastes than many, you may have tastes that are broad enough that almost every woman in the world could be attractive to you, but that's different from saying that you don't care what your lovers look like. Anyone who disagrees with me is welcome to comment or email, but unless you make an extremely good case for yourself, I will think you are lying.
Second, and perhaps more important, this is not the way to make yourself appealing. "I have no standards," is not sexy. At least part of the fun of a random hookup is knowing you can land someone who's worthwhile and who thinks you're worthwhile. That doesn't mean you both have to be moviestar gorgeous, but it does mean that you each judge the other to be interesting and appealing enough to bed. For me, someone who uses no taste in discerning who he sleeps with will, ultimately, make me feel yucky for bedding him. As I hate that feeling, I don't fuck people who give me the sense that they could be just as happy fucking anyone wandering around with a convenient hole.
Selectivity is a compliment to your partner(s). It's not about being snooty or rude, but rather, understanding and appreciating your own individual tastes. If you have a broad range of attractions, great! More power to you -- you're in a much better position to take advantage of opportunities than is someone who's extremely particular. But don't put down your potential partners in the process.
