ClueChick: real clues from a real chick

How do you handle STD discussion/questions?

This is one of my favorite questions, ever! I love it when guys are attentive and knowledgeable about the risks involved in sex, casual or otherwise, which is part of why I love it when a guy doesn't give me a hard time about meeting in a public place before getting together to fuck.

My approach to this is to mention condoms in my ad, for starters, so that right up front, everyone knows where my expectations are. I love it when guys respond including their own take on safer sex practices, and then I like to touch base on it in our initial emails leading up to a face-to-face meeting.

On those occasions that I respond to an ad, I don't always mention my safer sex practices right off the bat, but I do try to work them into the conversation early on.

Usually, guys have been pretty relaxed about talking about these things, though I've gotten some flak for asking questions someone thought were paranoid or excessive. Needless to say, if I get push-back on this, the conversation is over.

I will admit that I have had some hookups where I didn't discuss safer sex beforehand, and in those cases, I just assume we'll use whoever's safer sex rules are more stringent (usually mine). I'm floored, however, by how many men have showed up at my house with no condoms. Are they idiots? Are they simply assuming I'm using some other form of birth control? Do they think they're not just as much at risk of catching an STD as I am? By this point, if it's a guy I really want to fuck, I'll usually get out one of my condoms (which are better for giving head, anyway, because they're non-latex and thus, taste much better), but if I'm even remotely on the fence, I send him packing.