Drinking, drugs, and casual sex
I don't mix altered states with casual hookups. In other words, when I'm drinking, I don't pick up fuckbuddies, online or in person, and when I'm hunting, I don't drink. I don't use drugs at all, but if I did, the same rules would apply. (I'm not against recreational drug use; in fact, I'm generally in favor of it. I'm just a control freak who likes to keep her wits about her and doesn't trust chemicals or the people who sell them.)
A lot of people like to use alcohol or other drugs to relax themselves for a hookup, or to heighten sensations, or to make it more exciting. I have nothing against this, but I also don't necessarily advise it. Here's why:
In general, I try not to regret things I do in my life. I approach this in a two-pronged way: First, I try to make choices that I won't regret afterwards, and second, once I make a choice, I try to frame it in a way that it's a positive thing. Part of this means that I don't decide who I'm going to fuck while I'm drinking, especially because I know I'm a cheap date, and drinking makes me horny. One glass of wine and I'll be edging my chair close to yours. Two glasses and I'll be on your lap. This can be fun, for sure, when I've already fucked a guy, but it doesn't make for the most clear-headed decision-making if I'm trying to figure out if I want to fuck him in the first place.
The cultural acceptance of the drunken hookup is so well-established that even someone as sheltered from the mainstream as myself is aware of the jokes about how if your options aren't looking so good, you should have another drink. Maybe I'm just picky, but I'd rather feel as good about having someone in my bed when I wake up as when I bring them home.
I don't mind if my date drinks, though I am likely to take it personally if he gets snockered before we head to bed. Not to mention, a completely drunk lover is, generally, a lazy lover. Where's the fun in that?
You all know where your limits are, and if you don't, you should. So only you can say what level of high is okay for you. But if you have to get high to have fun with someone new, I'd say that's worth examining a little more closely, and you certainly won't be getting into bed with me.
