ClueChick: real clues from a real chick

I have, in front of me, a photograph that a man sent me in hopes that I would want to sleep with him through the sheer power of his physical beauty. How can I tell? He didn't write anything in his email. He just sent me a picture. I suppose he's going on the theory that a picture is worth a thousand words. His mistake, however, is that if he just sends me a photo, I'm the one who gets to pick the thousand words.

I'm going to start with: "drunk", "staggering" and "bad judgment".

Allow me to describe this picture to you:

It's an average-looking guy, a little bit chunky, but in a "I still play rugby with my pals" kind of way. He has a terrible haircut, with his stringy, light brown hair falling into his eyes, but not in an artful and sexy way so much as if to say he hasn't gotten his hair cut recently. His cheeks are brightly flushed, and his eyes are narrowed to squinty little specks. He has half a glass of beer tottering precariously in one hand while, with the other hand, he is flipping off the camera.

His body tells me that he's too drunk to do much more than lean forward and rest his elbows on his knees, and the middle finger extended to the camera's eye is clearly a stretch, as he looks extremely unbalanced by the effort.

This is a real photograph that I received in response to one of my ads, and the only good thing I have to say about it is that he's wearing pants. I go on the theory that the only time a guy should flip me off, if at all, is at the end of our relationship. So I took this photograph to indicate that he wanted a very brief relationship: He writes an email, I read it, he flips me off (via the photo), I hit delete.

I have to admire, if nothing else, his efficiency.