ClueChick: real clues from a real chick

You all know I think you should be practicing safer sex when you're out having fun, right? Good. Now, I leave it to you to decide what level of safety is right for you. Some people like to have up-to-date test results, full-body latex, and enjoy scrubbing each other down with hydrogen peroxide before and after. That's great, as long as everyone's on-board and comfortable with your precautions. Other people don't ask about testing and use latex only the first time. That's not the route I'd choose, but, again, if everyone's consenting and aware, all i can say is that you won't be sleeping with me.

But, I'm not here to lecture you about the "right" safer sex practices. In fact, I'm not even talking about safer sex with regards to STIs today. Indeed, I'm thinking about that traditional bugaboo: pregnancy.

Now, I'm in the lucky position of being the one in charge of the uterus, which means that I know what will happen if I have an unexpected pregnancy. For this reason, I don't bother to talk about it with my casual lovers. I take a lot of precautions to avoid pregnancy, and so far, so good. But if, through a stroke of incredibly bad luck, I got pregnant, I know what my options are, and which one I would choose.

But none of my casual lovers does. Because of all the men I've slept with in the last year, exactly none of them has raised the question with me. Guys, this is dumb. I know there's no good way to slip the pregnancy discussion into some hot pre-casual-sex chit-chat, but if it's not something you're thinking about, you could be in for a rude surprise.

For example, a close male friend of mine had a drunken hookup in a bar only to get a phone call 10 months later from the woman who was suing him for paternity. For twins. Surprise!

The men who sleep with me don't know that I'm a freak about protecting myself against pregnancy, and they have no way of knowing what I would choose to do if I were to become pregnant. One guy even tried to fuck me without a condom, I assume he was assuming I'm on the pill or something, but, seriously, this is foolishness.

Even if you are using condoms, even with "perfect use" you run the risk of pregnancy (about 5%, meaning that in a year, 5% of couples using condoms "perfectly" will get pregnant). And "typical use" is even worse (15%-20%). In one of the big benefits of being a woman, I have lots of other options to protect myself from unwanted pregnancy, many of which are more effective than condoms. You guys, though, don't have a lot of options, so it behooves you to consider what you would do if things went unexpectedly awry. You might even want to talk about it with the women you fuck, just for kicks.