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Don't offer to buy me, buy sex from me, or buy my body (unless we've prenegotiated something fun)

I had intended to give a long, thought-provoking weekend post on the difference between casual sex and sex in a relationship, but then I had such a fantastic weekend that I didn't get a chance to.

Today, I'd like to share yet another pet peeve. We all know that I'm not particularly impressed by those guys who post to CE offering money to "amateurs" who might be willing to hook up with them. Yes, I know some people fetishize the exchange of money, and I'm all for some good, clean fetishization, but I think many of those fellows offering money are doing so because they have few other charms to recommend them, not because it makes them hot to pay for it.

When I'm queen of the universe, things might change, but I'm willing to live with imperfection as long as there's fun to be had despite (or, in some cases, because of) that.

However, I occasionally get responses to my ad, which never mentions money, wherein the responder offers money as a way to set himself apart from the crowd. This zooms beyond tacky and lands well into sleazy. Guys, don't do that. It implies that you think all women can be bought.

Now, I actually do think that most people can be bought, particularly if they've already shown themselves to be open to casual encounters. But if a woman is already looking for casual sex, she's taking herself out of the "scarcity" equation and may even be trying to move her own sexual economy away from being a commodity.

You may think little enough of sexually adventurous women (or all women in general, for that matter) that you think it's reasonable to buy them off, but many of us find that downright offensive.

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