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Moaning in your email is rarely sexy

I recently received an email from an unusually well-spoken fellow, which said, in its entirety, "i have a great tongue to make you cuuuuuuuummmmmmmm"

As you might imagine, I was very, very impressed. I mean, who doesn't like to, uh, cuuuuuuuummmmmmmm?

Okay, so here's the thing. I like to come. Although I don't like it, I can put up with "cum", mainly because I have to. And it might be sexy to have someone say, for example, "Hey, baby, I want to feel you come," and when they're whispering it in my ear, I bet I'd like it if they were to draw out the word, like they're moaning. Yes, I can imagine that being hot.

But a string of "mmmmm"s in an email is not the same. It is not evocative. It is not sexy. It makes you look not only silly but downright sleazy. Don't do it.

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