Deal-breakers: he doesn't listen to what I say
Among the various warning flags I look for in early email exchanges with would-be lovers is the degree to which he seems to pay attention to what I say. I don't need a guy to remember that I said my cat was being fussy last night, but I do need him to remember that I said I don't like to be called "baby".
I don't know if it's true or not that a guy who can't be bothered to learn my preferences early on will be a guy who ignores my desires if it gets that far, but that's my working assumption, regardless. It's a bad sign if he's too hot to get his rocks off to realize that if he's not jerking himself off, it means there's another person in the equation.
I recently had an IM conversation with a guy who wanted to know when he could come over and get a blow job. Now, I like blow jobs as much as the next girl, maybe more, depending on who's next to me, and I can certainly enjoy the afternoon quickie, but I wasn't into it that day, and we hadn't met. I explained that I'd rather meet somewhere public, and he continued as though I hadn't said a thing. He could be here in an hour, he cajoled. When I demurred, he had nothing to offer but more insistence that I should say yes. Had he paid attention enough to know what I was saying, he could well have talked me into meeting him at the bar around the corner and, if all went well, a quickie after the fact.
But, no. Just as well; he sounds like a lazy lay, doesn't he?
