I need to expand my vocabulary
I need a new word to replace "lover". Or, not to replace it, but to allow for more specificity in the description. I can use "lover" to refer to the guy I've been not-infrequently fucking for the last year, who I also enjoy spending time with outside of the bedroom and even sometimes out in public. I can also use "lover" to refer to the guy who I see every 3-4 months only for sex and for conversation between bouts of sex. And I can use "lover" to talk about the guy I fucked once and may fuck again someday... But it only really feels right for the first.
I'd really like to call the other two something else. But I know people will get the wrong idea if I call someone my "fucker". What terms to you use?
Comments
"Fucker" and maybe "fuck buddy" could maybe carry the wrong connotation for some people. How about "sex buddy"?
Posted by: Zachary Gray | March 29, 2007 1:50 PM
1st: lover/boyfriend/girlfriend
2nd: fuck-buddy
3rd: fling/"the guy I picked up"
Posted by: ghislaine | March 29, 2007 4:04 PM
ditto on fuck buddy. (I abbreviate it to fb)
Posted by: Cat | March 29, 2007 4:10 PM
Do you all find "fuck buddy" to roll off the tongue freely? I love the term, but somehow it doesn't flow for me the same way "lover" does.
Posted by: ClueChick | March 29, 2007 5:22 PM
If you use the correct tone fuck buddy does in fact roll off the tongue.
A smile doesn't hurt either.
Posted by: Secnarf | March 29, 2007 7:14 PM
1st: I think lover pretty much covers it, friends-with-benefits also works
2nd: bed buddy, boy toy, fuck mate
3rd: conquest, lay, piece of meat, mr. right now, sleepover guest (assuming any sleeping takes place)
Posted by: b4f | March 31, 2007 4:53 PM
A friend is a friend, a pal is a pal, a buddy is someone you sleep with.
Lover is loaded with heavier connotations because of the "love" root. Sexuality and relationships have expanded beyond those connotations. The first situation fits because of the relationship outside the bedroom. Some sort of "buddy" or "friend" level work would work for the second situation. It holds the intimate but casual level feelings. "He's my good friend." The third is casual and somewhat random. Like an acquaintance or someone met at place that time. "He is this guy I know." "He is a sometime."
As the relationships get further from the heart, it get harder to describe them.
Posted by: Onemaster | April 2, 2007 11:25 AM
We call them all "fish" - first time, tenth time, doesn't matter. Posting on CL CE is like fishing - you never know what you are going to get.
Posted by: Grace | April 7, 2007 9:11 PM
I picked up "playmate" from an ex-lover, tho' it would be reasonable to find either the childish or Playboy associations of the word distasteful.
I really don't like "fuckbuddy." It has a cold feel to my ear. Like "So, dude. You wanna fuck or what?"
I kinda like "sexfriend" but I don't actually use the term much.
Posted by: Vinnie | June 12, 2007 11:49 PM