ClueChick: real clues from a real chick

One of the challenges I run into is this: Having a hot hookup makes me eager to have more. It's the "the more I get, the more I want" feedback loop. So I can go a while being focused on other things, and that's great, but then something comes together, I have a great date, and I'm off to the internet to go shopping for more new lovers.

That, in itself, is fine. But the problem is that after a hot date, I want more like that. That's great if my new lover is local and has time in his schedule that matches the time in my schedule, but that's rare. So, now I find myself trolling CL for tall, dark, handsome men with a slight southern accent and who drink Grey Goose and tonic while admiring my ass in just that way. And with big hands. Like that guy I met Monday! Mmm, Mr. Monday!

So, now I'm reading all the responses to my ad through the lens of wanting that particular thing. Which is silly! Because I like lots of different kinds of men, and lots of different kinds of hookups, and of all the criteria to sort on, proximate resemblance to Mr. Monday is really just about the dumbest there is.

Which leaves me trying to read responses with, "What would the sane (i.e., not lustfully remembering) me think about this response?" It's not pretty.

On the other hand, Mr. Monday? Very, very pretty. I sure am looking forward to seeing him again!

Posted by ClueChick at 7:12 PM in misc tips | Permalink | Comments (0)

Damn. It's been so long since I posted that Firefox doesn't even remember the url to the posting form. I'm ashamed!

Not that there's been much for me to talk about. I've been focused in large part on other things than casual sex (much to the dismay of my sex drive), and I've generally been laming out on the sexual adventures recently. In fact, until yesterday, it had been months since I posted an ad, which leaves me with a dearth of annoyances to inspire my ranting posts.

And, in fact, I don't have anything to complain about tonight, either, because after a long spell of simply not having the energy to put together any casual encounters, I just sent off a new lover after a very, very fun evening.

But I do have an observation out of it! I had a free evening, so I posted last night saying as much but with the caveat that I might end up not wanting to get together, so people shouldn't get their hopes up. Several (i.e., about 100) people responded, most of them, as usual, worthless, but a few were interesting enough to strike up a conversation. One proposed coffee before he and I were both in (separate, obviously) dinner meetings. I couldn't make it, so he proposed another option for after dinner. Okay, but I might not be up for much, was my response, to which he slyly pointed out that we could just meet for five minutes and then be on our way if we were both tired.

This was a great move on his part, because it made explicit the possibility that it might just be a situation where we meet, chat briefly, and that be it. Simply having that on the table made it feel less effortful to make the meeting, even though I knew the odds were good that once we met, we'd chat for longer.

The other smart thing he did, which fully annoyed me at the time, was he didn't give me his phone number, even after I gave him mine. This meant that I couldn't text him after my meeting to say, "Oh, sorry, nevermind." Which I really wanted to do. But I have to be pretty down on someone or in a terrible mood to stand someone up, and that wasn't the case here, so I went ahead and met him. Seriously, this was a genius move. I don't know if he did it on purpose; I'll have to ask.

Naturally, once there, conversation flowed, he was as attractive as he'd let on (yes, he hadn't even sent me a photo! what's gotten into me?) and easy to talk to.

That was a nice reminder of why I like casual sex.

Posted by ClueChick at 11:08 PM in actual responses | Permalink | Comments (2)